Stop Trying to Fit the Mold: Brittany Sleeper on Authenticity, Pageants, and Purpose

What happens when you stop trying to fit into someone else’s expectations and start embracing who you really are? On this episode of the Own Your Awkward Podcast, Brittany Sleeper, Mrs. Washington American 2022, joins Andy Vargo to share how her upbringing as an only child of dual military parents shaped her fierce independence and ultimately led her to success when she chose authenticity over conformity. Together they explore her platform, Humanizing the Badge, and discuss simple ways communities can support law enforcement while building stronger relationships.

Brittany’s story is a powerful reminder that the very traits that might make you feel “different” can actually become your greatest strengths.

Growing Up a “Little Adult”

Brittany describes her childhood as a bit unconventional. As the only child of two military parents who divorced early, she grew up in an environment where independence was not just encouraged, it was necessary.

From a young age, she learned how to take care of herself, often navigating situations most kids wouldn’t encounter until much later in life.

Instead of spending afternoons playing at the park or running around with large groups of friends, Brittany often found herself accompanying adults to meetings or spending time in environments that required maturity beyond her years.

As she puts it, she became what she calls a “little adult.”

While that upbringing shaped her independence, it also created challenges later in life, especially when it came to friendships. Brittany explains that her self-sufficient nature can sometimes come across as intimidating or overly strong to others.

But rather than seeing that as a flaw, she eventually learned to recognize it as part of who she is.

And once she embraced that, everything started to change.

When Authenticity Became the Winning Strategy

Brittany competed in the Mrs. Washington pageant for three years before ultimately winning the title in 2022.

Interestingly, her success didn’t come from trying harder to fit the mold. It came when she stopped trying to fit it at all.

Like many competitors, Brittany initially believed there was a certain way she was supposed to act, speak, and present herself in the pageant world.

But during her third attempt, something shifted.

Instead of trying to play a role, she chose to show up as her authentic self.

She shared her real story. She spoke honestly about her life experiences. And she stood firmly behind her platform of supporting law enforcement, even during a time when that topic could be controversial.

That decision made all the difference.

Rather than trying to meet an imagined expectation, Brittany focused on transparency, passion, and purpose. The judges saw someone genuine, someone confident, and someone who truly believed in her mission.

That authenticity ultimately led to her winning the title.

Finding Your Passion: Follow the Fire

One of the most powerful moments in the conversation comes when Brittany shares how she discovered her life’s passion.

Her advice is simple but profound.

If you’re trying to find your purpose, look for two things:

• What breaks your heart
• What fuels your fire

Where those two things intersect, you’ll often find the cause that matters most to you.

For Brittany, that intersection became her platform: Humanizing the Badge.

Her goal is to help bridge the gap between law enforcement officers and the communities they serve.

In a world where headlines can sometimes amplify division, Brittany wants to remind people that behind every badge is a human being with a family, a story, and a commitment to protecting others.

Humanizing the Badge: Building Community Connections

Brittany’s platform focuses on strengthening the relationship between communities and law enforcement through simple, positive interactions.

And the best part?

You don’t need money or influence to make a difference.

Some of the easiest ways Brittany suggests supporting local officers include:

• Having kids draw pictures or write thank-you notes
• Attending local “Coffee with a Cop” events
• Bringing small tokens of appreciation to local stations
• Simply expressing gratitude during everyday encounters

These small gestures can go a long way in building trust and reminding officers that their work is seen and appreciated.

More importantly, they create opportunities for positive interactions that strengthen community relationships.

Embracing the Traits That Make You Different

Another theme that comes through strongly in this conversation is the importance of owning the qualities that make you unique.

For Brittany, that meant accepting that she isn’t the stereotypical “needy” personality when it comes to friendships. She’s independent, direct, and self-driven.

And instead of trying to change that, she found people who naturally connect with that energy.

Many of those relationships came through communities of first responders, military families, and other individuals who value resilience and self-sufficiency.

In other words, she found her people.

That shift in perspective is powerful. Instead of asking, “How do I change myself to fit in?” Brittany learned to ask, “Where do I naturally belong?”

Letting the Next Generation Be Kids

Interestingly, Brittany’s childhood experiences also shaped how she approaches parenting.

Because she grew up so quickly, she is intentional about making sure her own children experience the simple joys of childhood.

Trips to the park. Play places. Disney adventures. Moments of carefree fun.

In many ways, she says she’s nurturing the little girl inside herself while giving her kids the childhood she didn’t always have.

It’s another example of how life experiences can shape not only who we become, but how we show up for the next generation.

When It’s Your Time, It’s Your Time

One of Brittany’s reflections on her pageant journey is something many people can relate to.

Success doesn’t always happen the first time.

Or the second.

Sometimes it takes growth, patience, and life experience before everything aligns.

Looking back, Brittany believes that her three-year journey toward winning Mrs. Washington happened exactly when it was supposed to.

Each year helped her grow, refine her message, and become more confident in who she was.

And when the moment finally arrived, she was ready.

The Power of Owning Your Awkward

At its core, Brittany’s story perfectly embodies the message behind the Own Your Awkward Podcast.

The very traits that once made her feel different, independence, confidence, and directness, became the qualities that helped her succeed.

Her journey is proof that authenticity is not a weakness.

It’s a superpower.

And when you stop trying to fit someone else’s mold and start embracing who you truly are, incredible things can happen.